Kaya ko pa pala laruin ang larong ito pagkalipas ng mahabang panahon...ang komplikadong paglalaro na matagal ko ng iniwasan...
Nasabi ko sa sariling hinding hindi na, ngunit heto na naman ako. OO kanta yun, sigurado kinanta mo noh?
Nakakapanibago...nakakapanibago lang na may kayakap akong muli...
Nakakapanibago lang na andito ka sa aking tabi...nadadama ang kahubdan mo...init ng katawan mo...
Ganito nga pala ang pakiramdam ng isang mainit na halik...ganito nga pala kasarap ang hatid ng mga nag aalab na labi...
Ganito nga pala ang pakiramdam ng halos malunod sa ligayang hatid ng nag iinit na mga katawan...
Ganito nga pala ang pakiramdam ng may kayakap habang natutulog...hawak hawak ang mga kamay na parang ayaw itong pakawalan...
Ganito nga pala makipaglarong muli...ganito nga pala kasaya ang panandaliang aliw...
Sandaling ligaya sa piling ng isang estranghero...
Salamat sa yo, sa isang hapon na puno ng pagpapaligaya... muli mo'ng pinadama sa akin kung paano mabuhay, kung paano muli maging isang HIGAD sa kati...
charot!
Na kahit sa isang beses, ako'y naging sa iyo, at ika'y naging akin.
"Would you like to have dinner with me sometime? maybe on the 26th, is that OK with you?"
That's what he asked after some time of chatting through messenger, honestly, I like talking to him even though I haven't met him yet, well, I saw his picture already. I was able to know him when he sent me a message telling me how he likes my blog that he almost finished it from the beginning. I was flattered of course. We chat whenever we have a chance.
His name: Aldwin
I agreed on that date, since its my day off and its not bad meeting new friends. I was very vocal about having a new friend. I told him I don't have a bi or gay friend in my life, my friends are straight, male and female. It would make a big difference having someone like me. He agreed since he is new here in Doha, barely a month with no new friends yet, he told me later that he's the only Filipino on their company. Technically he is alone.
I was excited. Even if its 2 weeks to go. I was at work one morning when I decided to text him, we exchanged many messages, when later I told him me and other two friends will dine in at a resto and go to the mall after. Which he will go for late lunch too. He asked if we could meet there, I was hesitant. Its too soon, I thought I still have 2 weeks to meet him!
I'm having butterflies on my stomach! I don't know what to type in on my cellphone keypads. Yes or no? Finally I said: OK, I'll find a way when we're at the mall. My friends are already annoyed at me since I was on my phone almost the whole time while we're eating texting him. But my friends enjoyed the foods and the chats and it took them a long time before deciding to go malling!
Aldwin had to go back at their office! So there, meeting:cancelled! I was sad.
I told him we could catch up later or grab a coffee somewhere since he lives a few blocks from my building. When I came home around 8 in the evening, he invited me to have a dinner instead at a nearby fast food. I changed to casual clothes and hit the street, its a walking distance from my flat.
He came in earlier than me. Then I saw him, wearing his jeans and eyeglasses. Hmmm, pwede!!! He's a jolly person I could tell, and no pretensions, no "arte" whatsoever. I like him...as a friend, LOL! Its too early to think about anything romantic and besides I don't know what's in his mind yet. Our meeting was very nice, I enjoyed it. We're talking about anything for more than an hour.
I thought: I like this guy, he could be a very good boyfriend...
But I immediately erased that thought. I don't want to rush in and hurt in the process. Its better to be friends for the meantime, and if its meant to be, and escalated to something deeper, why not. But now, I got to hold my emotions and enjoy the new friendship with him.
"its still early, can we go to your flat and continue our conversation?" he asked.
Next thing I knew we were walking on the familiar street towards my flat. I was embarrassed because I'm not a neat person when it comes to my house!ahaha. I'm messy and lazy cleaning up! We watched TV and laughing and having a great time. We didn"t notice that its getting very late. Its 12am. He have work at 8am, I asked him: What time you'll go home?
No response. I knew he don't want to end the night so soon. I could sense it. Me too. I don't want him to leave yet. Sexual tensions are building up. I'm fighting it. I made a promise to myself that sex will be the last thing on my mind. I'm sick and tired of having sex first before knowing a guy or him knowing me first.
Hindi akopakipot ha! LOL
He was sitting on my couch and I decided to sit on its armchair, it surprised me when he lay his arms on my legs for comfort while watching TV, I allowed him, until he put my arms around his shoulders. I kissed his hair. I hugged him tighter this time. I don't want that moment to end. Its magical.
I whispered to his ear, I don't want you to go...
Ok, I'll stay...
But you have work in the morning?
I'll go at 6.
Ok.
Next thing I knew, I was changing the pillow cases on my bed! waaaaa!!! Am I doing the right thing here???? For sure something will happen!
I told him : no sex OK? we'll just sleep together.
"of course" he said. Then he took off his shirt and left his boxer shorts.
I panicked deep inside, if he will sleep shirtless that would be dangerous for me, I will feel his skin next to mine and I will explode with hornyness!LOL. I offered him a shirt, he refused, said he cannot sleep with it. I sighed.
When I came back from the bathroom he's already sleeping. I went to my side of the bed. I don't know what possessed me but I hugged him from his back. He acknowledge it, he came closer.I tried to sleep and keep my hard dick away from his back and butt!LOL prayed that it would stop pulsating!haha
I heard him snoring a little. I felt his bare skin on my arms. It felt good. I stopped myself from biting his earlobes. I slept after a while. I took my arms from him and decided to shift on my side, he followed and this time he was the one hugging me from my back. I missed this. Someone hugging me. Cuddling me...when was the last time someone hugged me this close while sleeping? a year ago? with Brian...
But I was surprised when he started giving me light touches on my shoulders, seducing me...he started moving his hips against mine. My eyes wide open! Oh no...this is it! Will I do it with him...but he promised no sex...
He took my hand and put inside his boxers, I felt his manhood...
"please s@ck it..." he whispered. I said no....he begged "please..."
I faced him and his lips gently moved closer to mine, I kissed him, slowly he kissed me back, then hungrily...I moaned with pleasure...
I like kissing, maybe liked it more than the actual sex itself...
We are both on fire, but I'm still undecided if I want to continue this... I promised myself not to be this easy on sex...been very casual about sex with darkguy before...
I promised my self that the next time I'll do it, it have to be with someone I love, someone who loves me...
I gathered all my self control and said : we cant do this, we are friends.
And with those words, as if I threw a cold drum of water on him and he stopped.
"yes we are friends" he said
I kissed his lips gently and hugged him until we slept.
Its 6am he rose from my bed, I didn't move a muscle wait for him to wash up and dressed up. He lay his head on my tummy and wait for me to respond. I hugged him. But didn't kiss him I knew I have a killer breath that time LOL!
I walked him to the door and as I was putting the keys he moved very close from my back and started touching me wildly, I was immediately on fire, I put my hand inside his pants and touched his manhood, he pulled down my shorts from my back and touching me...we almost did it.
He stopped and said: we are friends.... damn! i said im my mind
Warning:The post you are about to read is perverted in nature.If you're not a pervert get your ass off here. Oh com'on! I know you're not leaving LOL!
I've talked to my good friend last time on yahoo messenger and he told me something that really bothered me.
"Mac, when I urinated this afternoon,I think I saw some semen with it."
And I was like "whaaaaattt?!" haha.I thought he was joking, but he isn't.
"This might be due to my lack of masturbation"
"Why?When was the last time you masturbate?"
"Ahm, six months ago?"
I fell off my chair!!! (napatambling ako ng bonggang-bongga mula Laguna hanggang Cavite, nahilo nga 'ko e LOL) after hearing that!Oh My Gawd! I mean, wanking is a normal guy thing right?Im sure even priests are guilty of this! LOL
My cousin even joked around when we were at the church that the reason why the priest was "moody" that day was because he wasn't able to wank! "
"Are you dead serious???!" I said
"Yeah, I know, you wont believe it but its true.For me, masturbation is a sin."
I thought to myself, if that would be a sin, I might be counting like a thousand sins already because I've been masturbating since the Dinosaur era!!! In fact there was a time in my teenage years that I was chilling and I needed to rush home to do it!why does it have to be so good ?!LOL like it has its own mind (yeah I know it has a head too!) but when it feels like it, he wont let me refuse!haha.Was that the "Demon" inside of me?
Maybe if the bathroom floor and tissues can be pregnant I already have dozens of babies LOL!!!!
"Besides I don't have that urge to do it, unlike other guys. Unlike you. I can even survive without sex!"
I cant believe it, that this guy can actually survive for six months! I cant even stand it for 3 days LOL! It feels like I can rape someone like a dog if i cant release that "white-ish-slimy-thing" inside of my "tube" haha as in nakakanginig!!!
I ended up advising him to do it that night(and begged him to do it on web cam so that I can watch LOL!) maybe it was looking for a way out, I added, it might be building up inside and might explode in the coming days!hahaha! I wonder what his boyfriend thinks?They recently got together.
Hmmm,I forgot to ask him the next day though, how it was?like how many gallons had he collected?! or nata-de-coco na ba or kaong? hahaha
How about you? Or are you like him, surviving for 6 months?!haha
This is a re-post.Well i guess many of you haven't read this post before.I wrote this last year when there's only three people reading my blog haha Berna and Sasha and a close friend, one I threatened to kill if he don't read them LOL.I just thought that you might want to see this,its about John.The only ex-bf that I wanted to come back to if given a chance.(till now?maybe..)
I did a lot of awful and shameful things in the past,you know,I did some shoplifting at a bookstore when I was 14,I didn't pay a jeep ride when I was 16,and the driver knew haha he kept on saying"o yung mga di pa bayad jan magbayad na"haha.But nothing can compare to what I did to my ex-boyfriend's boyfriend.I had sex with him to get back at him for not taking me back!Got it?
Lets put it this way,I'll name my ex bf as john,and the other guy is Joshua,before me,John and Joshua are lovers for a year,when they broke up I met John and we became boyfriends for 4 months,but Joshua kept on texting on John,how he still cares for him,but John didn't care at all,he's happy with me.And then we broke up,my fault I admit,but after 2 weeks I realized I cant live without John in my life that I love him still,so I asked him to give me another chance,he refused.I was hurt.This happened about 3-4 years ago.
After 2 weeks maybe,I texted him again,and he said to me, "me and Joshua are back together",I felt my heart was broken into pieces,I felt betrayed,to think Joshua left him for another guy in the past that caused their break up then.He's a two timer I said to him.And here I am showed him good things and loved him so much in our relationship,we fought big time that caused our break up,but I asked for another chance and yet he refused me,I mean I thought I didn't deserved it.
So I thought of a brilliant plan,an evil plan.I want John to regret choosing Joshua over me.And for him to realize that he's not really the faithful type of guy.Good thing I had Joshua's number,I stole it from John secretly because I'm annoyed of him texting my bf.I texted him,pretended I'm looking for a text mate,he didn't know me and had no idea I was John's ex bf.So he fell for my trap,we kept on texting without John knowing it,so I thought he's really not the trustworthy type,I was happy that I'm having my revenge at John.
After a week of texting and chatting,I invited him to meet and he agreed, and we went to Festival mall alabang,along the way riding the van,we were holding hands through out the travel time.I was seducing him.We ate and talk and I asked him if he wants to stay the night with me,he said,why not,so we checked in at Sogo Hotel.And Oh Lord... he's too hot and sexy!He is hairy all over,his chest,his groin,his legs,i cant believe I'm having sex with this guy,my ex-bf's current bf!I took some pictures and videos of us together,kissing torridly and hugging... my proof that we're together,another part of my plan.
This is his actual picture when were inside the motel room.Look at that hairy body...I still remember how it felt like when Im on top of him.Yummy!
Till now I cant forget how his body feels,the muscles,the hairs,he's good in bed,its really great!One of the best I had,maybe because it was a stolen and I had a hidden agenda with it,or that he have what I love about a guy:body hairs!!I don't know!haha.By the way he is a bottom!Anyway I'll skip the details,OK,I don't want my blog to be labeled some adult rated site.We spent the whole night together and he still dont have any idea who I am or what I'm doing till we went home.I knew he had a good time.I was wearing a devil's smile in my lips.Success.
After a week I texted John,I asked him I still want him back that Joshua don't deserve him,I said he's not honest with him and that he cant be trusted,he said
"you only want to destroy our relationship" " what if I have some proof that he spent a night with me?"I told him "oh really?don't make me laugh!"
He said I'm just bluffing,then I sent the most daring picture of us kissing and half naked, our picture of Joshua together through MMS
He said "damn you!Get lost!Fuck you!How could you do this to me!!!"
I don't know what to feel then,I wanted to laugh and cry at the same time.I kept on telling myself he deserved it.He put it upon himself.He shouldn't have hurt me and choose that looser over me.But I can't feel really happy.I'm hurting too.I hurt him I know and his hurt are crossing through me,I love him so much.
I felt the guilt big time.I'm a bad ass!One consolation I have was,at least I made my point that Joshua cant be trusted.A player.A two-timer.I did him good favor.I wanna laugh at my thought haha.Then Joshua texted me he cursed me and said I'm a loser!He said he and John are over thanks to me.
"if I've known you were his ex I should have killed you!" he said "haha whatever dude!have a happy life.You're pathetic!"I replied
And i said to myself,mission accomplished...after many years,it was Christmas,I texted John and asked him how is he and he said he's OK and he's with a new bf and that they are on their 8 months...it still hurts like hell till that time.I said could he forgive me?
"yeah I already did but i can't be friends with you,don't text me anymore..."
(*FYI- I already moved on.This was 4 years ago.I just wanted to share you this story.So that you will know what to do next time when your bf ditched you.LOL!Im just kidding ok!hehe)
My sister woke me up this afternoon and told me that Brian,my ex boyfriend,arrived and he's at our living room.I told her "im still sleepy" but she kept on banging my door for me to stand up and face my visitor.I had no choice but to rise from the bed one hour early than my alarm time.And there he was,after a year...Brian.Wearing a yellow polo shirt,sitting at our sofa.I dont know how many ex-bf I had I lost count already!haha maybe they're dead or what!(knock on wood!) I was told that my sister fetched him up at the terminal because he wasn't familiar with the place anymore(?)that he has been texting me for the last two hours but I was sound asleep haha!After he got tired of texting me,he texted my sister instead to wake me up.Im glad my sister did the fetching.I hate fetching!(It so happened that she have to withdraw some cash this afternoon,thats why she didn't bother to wake me up and picked up my demanding ex-bf!)
He could go anytime at our house,I mean he's been here for like a hundred times in our 8months relationship.He just wanted to feel special that's why he asked to be picked-up.Brian has always been like that,he wanted me to pick him up at the bus terminal and accompany him back when he's going back to manila(I accused him of pa-girl with this attitude).Most of the time I didn't oblige,then he'll get mad at me haha but I don't mind,whatever.
I asked him why he's here?he said "i missed your sis and your nephew' (and I just thought to my self :blah-blah-blah whatev) I know he missed me!hah! am I conceited or what?! haha.Me and Brian have been friends after we broke up,we've been texting once in awhile.Sometimes if I don't reply at his text right away he would say :what's taking you to reply so long?" and I was like..hmm,demanding?!But i would explain to him,i don't know why I did!
I could sense a little jealousy when he asked me how many boyfriend did I had since we broke up and I said "there's three" and he just said trying to hide the emotions with "ang galing ha!" he never had a bf after me,that it is his choice, "bf's are only giving me headaches"he added.He was a graduate of Nursing and waiting for his board exam result.He applied for a med rep position at Manila while waiting.
Then I asked him to put his bag inside my room,then he took a bath and I was like"hmmm,this reminds me of when were together and taking a bath was one of our rituals before making love...(devilish grin) hehehe and I was like thinking dirty while he's taking a bath,I hid the lube under the bed for easy access LOL!Then he borrowed my shorts and T-shirts and lay down my bed and turned on my TV.
Then I locked my room's door secretly and I went to bed with him and I hugged him from behind and started giving him feathery touches,he didn't resist and I was like Oh my he still likes me.Then I was about to kiss him and then he moved his mouth away,then I chased it and he moved away again and chased it again and finally catched his lips and I kissed him hungrily...I was about to insert my tongue inside when he breaks our kiss and said...
Brian: "stop,stop,I don't want this,were not together " Me:"so what?we could still kiss and have sex!" Brian: "I don't do SEB!" he snapped Me:"hahaha but this is not SEB!You knew me for a long time!" Brian:"whatever!I don't wanna have sex with someone who is not my bf" Me:"fine,then I'm your boyfriend tonight!"ha ha
And he was like furious that he realized that I only want to get laid tonight!ha ha which is the truth by the way!I don't feel the same way towards him anymore I mean there's still some memories of him and I still care for him but love?I don't think so.Maybe if we spend more time together the feelings might come back.But I noticed he is more ticklish now than before,he has never been with anyone for a year now he said.
He kept on refusing but I was persistent I kept on chasing his lips and grabbing his nipples and then he stopped fighting,finally he got carried away by my sweet lips and tongue LOL just like in the movies, he closed his eyes and hold my face while kissing him gently and I grabbed his undies and then he was on red alert again!he broke away from my kiss!ha ha.What a self control he had!Whew!
Then I snapped at him and said "what is your problem???" he said "we are not together,its not like before that you could kiss and make love to me anytime you want,we could just hug here at the bed instead" and I said "but why?I missed you and I want you now"(I sounded desperate) Then I tried to kiss his neck and shoulders and he loose the control again and allowed me for a minute and stoped me once again that's when I stop pursuing him anymore,I'm mad at him!I want to have sex!!!Waaaa!
"Ang arte mo!ewan!" I said and went to my computer and started to read my mails.
We ate dinner and pretend nothing happened so that my family wont see were fighting.When were watching TV at my room again and I was typing this post he said:
"come over here..." "Why..?"-me "just come here!" (with his hands inviting me to lay down beside him) "no."I said "hmp,now its you who's maarte!" "talaga!" "you'll sleep at the airbed" -I added
But now,I got so into reading some blogs and I realized he's snoring at my bed and I don't have the heart to wake the bastard to move to the airbed on the floor!Waaaa!
I have been with same "top" guy before.Our relationship lasted for two months at that time it was already long for me since I'm only 23 years old then and all I did from previous years are having sex with any guy I like.Meaning: slut LOL! But that was in the past.I'm 29 now and I can say I'm done at that stage in my life,casual sex is a no-no already.
I met Mark from TV-chat where in you will post your number to look for a text mate at that time it was so "in" now I realized how cheap it was haha!But I gotta admit I loved it then I got too many respondent a 100 replies!My pre-historic Nokia 5110 phone almost exploded!He was one who passed for a text mate.We met and we instantly liked each other.He's cute and got a stable job.
We became boyfriends.And everything was beautiful for me.He seems so perfect.We were in love.But there was one problem.He's top too.Well,I'm his first bf and he was a virgin too but he didn't wanna be the bottom.I didn't want either.I cant forget him because his lips was so sweet (damn I love virgins) and he responded to my touchings very hungrily...and he always stare at my d*** i just pretended I didn't see him (napapahiya siya e).
Actually you might think that it was a lame sexual relationship,no one even do the blow job!haha.We kissed and touched each other,but I discovered one thing...we were both standing and I pulled off his briefs and mine and I pressed my d*** with his and it was so good!The sensation was so great...its hotness and the hair Oh lord it was heaven.Next thing we knew I was on top of him and I was humping and pressing my p***s on him real hard...I later called it "kiskisan" with the special help of lubricant and it was the only thing we did for the duration of our relationship.
I didnt know it was possible to have a wonderful sex life even if we are both tops.I preferred to do it standing with his one leg wrapping around my waist.I have nothing to asked for during those time.He's thoughtful,he checked me out at home,he was nice to my sister and he's in love with me.I could feel it in my boner I mean bones.
Why was it so nice to make your bf jealous?haha even if he tried to hide it, brought smiles to my face...
But I guess all things are not permanent,we broke up.I got really jealous to this girl he's with and when I look back I realized how stupid I was to let him go away.i mean he's gay why would he be interested in girls?he loves holding my d*** for god sake!I loved him so much.I asked for forgiveness a 100 times over and then he finally answered me and said "I don't know anymore,I don't think I can love you again.."
And after 2 weeks he texted me "I wanna come over at your house" I thought to my self,thank god maybe this is it,he finally realized he still love me.We talked but nothing about us and we went to bed and when I tried to kiss him he avoided my lips, "no kissing pls.." I was hurt by that,I didn't complain,beggars cant be choosers right?
We just had sex ate charo...haha.And he just visit me to have sex...he's punishing me.I felt so sad about it...what happened to us?I know its my fault but I already repent on all of my mistake and felt really sorry for it.
I felt like a whore a sex machine that if he had an itch he will have sex with me.But despite of all that I still love him.He just vanished all of a sudden,his number became unreachable.It made me cry.But anyway it was 6 years ago...
