August 21, 2009
Who Am I To You?
We chat, we talk, we have dates, we go watch movies, things like lovers do...and oh, we love to kiss each other, except that we're not lovers, yet...confusing?haha. Well,guess what!me too!LOL
But I'm happy. I enjoy every minute of being with his company.
I don't wanna ask him,and he never ask me too. My friend told me to let it be,that i just go with the flow when I told her about it. So days have gone by that Idon't know what kind of relationship we have. Are we kissing-friends?or friends with benefits?or that I'm just a "fling"?
But out of nowhere,when we're chatting it slipped my finger and typed these words:who am I to you? and he said: its complicated. I was hurt.yeah I know,i shouldn't asked it.But I'm so stubborn. I don't like his answer,I could appreciate it if he said:yes we are friends or I wanna know you better.
By saying its complicated,its like telling me he got someone else back home,or he cant be in a relationship or something, or its a escape-pass from me!
So I stopped talking to him. When he went online I ignored him the first time, and he was waiting for my messages too. He broke 20 minutes of silence and said "whoa, you really are mad at me? he told me that he was just joking and that he's sorry that he hurt me with what he said." you know me, I'm crazy!I always joke around"
Mr.Italian answered the question: who am i to you?
"You are my new friend. And we will see what will happen. We just start a new relationship. I don't think we are boyfriends yet. But we are going to that direction...to become one...seems like one..."
Hmmm, not bad! I thought to myself.
"and besides you're the one who started kissing me!" he accused me
"OK i wont kiss you again!" I snapped
"why?(with a sad smiley)" he asked " if you don't, I will kill you LOL!" I smiled at his reply.I'm back to being fine again LOL!Everything is back to normal.
Yesterday, Iasked him if he want to come with me to the supermarket at the mall today. I'm not even sure if he will agree, since he have work,but he did. He picked me up at my flat and took me to the supermarket. I was holding his hand inside the car while he drive. If I let it go he will pick up my hand and hold it back...he drove with one hand.hehe
I was smiling and amused when I looked at him when we were inside the supermarket, he was pushing the cart while I pick the stuffs I need for a week's supply of food. I can't believe that this respectable guy while wearing his uniform, so tall, and so cute are here with me taking a break from work and pushing the grocery cart!hahaha
It just took us an hour to complete what I needed and he drove me home. He stayed at my room for another hour and I took the chance to "rape" him! Kidding! Well, he is a willing victim by the way!haha. He needed to come back to work since he only took a break to accompany me at the supermarket.
He said he will try to drop by before going home later.I said "OK,i guess I'm still awake during that time"
"Of course you will be awake, because you need to wait for me till I finish work" he said grinning.
Right now, I'm contented for what we have. I don't know when or where, but i am surely going to treasure every minute I spend with this Italian Guy.