So, We're Talking Now?

It was really awkward having him on one table...I think its a bad idea for coming here. I'm uncomfortable being with him. We didn't talk for about 5 months. We ignored each other for the longest time. We just stop talking for some reason I don't know!

And here we are now.

Sharing a table with 4 other guys.

Me and Darkguy!

On one table this close???!

Its a friend's birthday dinner. He invited me. Didn't know he would also invite Darkguy. I don't have any control who he wants to invite. Its too late to back out now, I already said yes before he called Darkguy to come.

I avoided his eyes. I avoided talking to him. I intentionally ignored him and spoke to the guy next to him. I could see he's looking at me from the corner of my eyes. He lose weight. He works out they said. I could see the development on his arms and chest (I only imagined it without his shirt on LOL!)

He came with Eli. A former crush of mine. I believe they are closer now. They dined out, stay at each other's flat from time to time. Should I be jealous? I shouldn't be. Maybe I just felt a little weird. I mean, I used to chase Eli before. And I used to f*ck Darkguy before. And now they are together?

Though not sure about it. I heard Darkguy's wife now pregnant with their second child. Maybe they are really just friends.

I think I still have a crush on Eli! Clayton, its just a crush OK? haha. No more. No less. And I don't know if he likes me now than before. I noticed some changes on him. Its like he is giving me some signs that he is now ready! LOL

But deadma nalang me. I love Clayton noh!

Darkguy was trying to reach out on me. He spoke to me directly and I have no choice but to look at him and listen. I don't want the other guest to feel the tension between us. It felt so weird looking at his eyes while he spoke to me.

I know he's just trying to cover the real situation between us. People would ask questions if they noticed we are not talking. Especially Egay. He is so persistent on knowing the truth. He knew something is going on. I won't give him that satisfaction! So I just go with the flow and pretend I'm Ok talking at Darkguy.

He opened the door for me when I went out.

As we all walk back to our building (we all live in one building) I walk side by side with Egay avoiding him. And vice versa.

I don't know if this event changes anything between us.

(click here to read more posts about Darkguy)

Mac Is Two Years Old!

I know its little late for celebrating, but better late than never right? I feel really awful for forgetting it, I should've checked my phone's calendar.

Its my blog's anniversary!

So, my blog turned two last August 7. I remember, its the time that I was busy being homesick and melodramatic! haha. No wonder I forgot about it.

I can't believe Maccallister is 2 years old too! My alter ego. A name, well its actually a surname, that I got from watching my fave drama series at the time, Brothers and Sisters. For two years, I was referred to as Mac. Well, I kinda like it though. Parang totyal at gwapo pakinggan! LOL!

This blog means a lot to me, its my life. Its my baby. Its my whole being. Everything in it was the true event that happened, and I will be very happy when I grow old, I mean really really old like major-major-old, that one day I could sit on that couch, and look back and reading entries...remembering those moments...crying in it...laughing in it...

Hay, I'm so glad I made this blog a personal one. A random personal blog.

I can't forget the people that I've met since I started this blog. Salamat sa inyo.

And to my few and wonderful online friends: Rik from UK (see you there pag nag escort ako ng patient), Tizzy from Indonesia, Stainedheart from Lebanon (kahit wala na tayo communication naging part ka ng life ko hehe drama), Jaypeelo from Nevada, Delfin from New York (malay mo, maging tayo din sa bandang huli, pero di pa definitely ngayon haha!), EDC from Dubai (we've been good friends for almost 2 years nun nasa dubai ka pa, di mawawala yun kahit na bad ang ending natin) and Vin from Texas (miss you dork!). You are all part of this journey.

This blog has been a great tool also for me in meeting those "boyfriends" in the past, you already know who you are! hahaha. Yaw ko na isa isahin, kasi kakahiya!

To those avid readers and followers. Gosh, I never thought it would be that much. Para sakin madami na yung 182 na followers ha! Parang kelan lang, halos wala nagbabasa dito! Just keep on following! Para maging 200! LOL

I, thank you. You don't know how you made me so happy when you give me emails and instant messages saying how you love reading them from the very first post up to the latest entry. Its overwhelming.

So anyway, masyado na madrama 'to. I am looking forward for another year of blogging with you guys.

Cheers!

One Month Na Tayo Clayton

Today is a special day for us

August 23rd, exactly 11:50pm last month

You and me agreed to a commitment, that

You and me will love each other...

You and me will be there for each other...

To stay together till I come back next year...

I wanna hold on to that promise

To come home to you...

Every year...

Where my heart belongs.

Long distance relationship is not easy

And yes, we argue, most of the time

Even though we are not perfect partners

At the end of the day, we still agreed on one thing:

We love each other.

I love you so much...as in uber

(like what you always texts me hehe)

Happy first month together baby-baby-ko.

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