Clayton still managed to sent me these shirts even though we are on a time off...its been 5 days now and we haven't talk or exchange a single message toward each other since.
I'm not mad anymore, actually I was not really that mad at him. Surprised maybe. Surprised with what I have found out I guess. He told me he never dated or cheated on me. That it was just a simple thing out of boredom. In my heart I want to believe him. And I did.
Maybe because I know Clayton is good guy.
I hope.
But out of respect with my self, and to teach him a lesson, I asked for a cool off. Because I'm supposed to get mad. Right?
There are two shirts he sent me. This one has a print that says: Single. Maybe he wanted me to choose between the two. But I'm still thinking if this would be my love life status from now on...
After a careful thought... finally, I listened to my heart and decided to wear the other shirt...
We need some time off. I told him. To think. To see if I could still trust him. But one thing is sure. I still love him.
Why do we always hurt the ones we love?
"Mahal na mahal kita...nagkamali ako, oo admitted ko yun...alam ko ang feeling ng mawalan, at ayoko na maulit yun. Siguro sa cool off na to, papayag ako...pinukol na din ako ng sarili kong bato sa ulo. Pero sana, mahanap mo sa puso mo yung mapatawad ako at ituloy yung kung saan tayo mapuputol. Kasi i love you. And i mean it."
(I love you so much...I know its my fault, I wont deny it...I know how it feels to lose someone, and I don't want that to happen again. I may have agreed on this time off, but i do hope that you could find in your heart to forgive me. Because I love you. and I mean it.)
We've all encountered some kind of hardships and troubles in our lives...mine was something about money.
I remember when I was in grade school, when dad quit his job abroad and stayed with us since, mom forced herself to work to get something on our plate every day. Its a moment in our lives that will always stay with me. I cannot forget how tired my mom was like during those days...
She was a food vendor in front of the school gate (like isaw, hotdogs etc.) She even put up a small eatery at a tricycle terminal with a capital borrowed from 5-6. She wake up so early in the morning and sleep very late at night.
I usually gets very emotional when I think about it till now. My mom did everything she could for us to survive.
I remember having only one pair of shoe for school. It was very old and torn down. My mom cannot get me a new one and she would stitch it up and glued it together so that I could use it again. But I'll cry and asked her to get me a new one.
Yeah, I was a brat.
How many school outings and excursion did I missed? How many school projects did I struggle to pass due to lack of fundings?
Jollibee was just a dream for us during those days. Our television set was terrible, you have to kick it first before I could watch my fave show.
I don't wanna go back there again. I just dont. Now that I'm earning enough for myself here in Doha, I have to stop spending so much on unnecessary stuffs.
Its funny when I was working way back in our country, my ten thousand pesos salary was not enough, and now that I get paid many times over that, its still not enough!
Maybe its true, you get higher pay, you also get a higher lifestyle.
I've been a material "girl" for a while now. (Girl daw talaga e noh!LOL)
bakit kasi naimbento pa yang shopping!hahaha More than a year na ko dito la pa ko ipon.
This have to stop.
Anywayz,
Today as I was getting a bottle of soy sauce from the grocery store,
I smiled and thought to myself: I used to eat rice with just soy sauce in it for dinner...
There are two shirts he sent me. This one has a print that says: Single. Maybe he wanted me to choose between the two. But I'm still thinking if this would be my love life status from now on...
