Sa Ating Pag Iisa

Usapan na namin na darating siya nun araw na yun ng linggo. Kaya naman hindi na ko nagulat nun tinatanung nya ko sa BBM if gising na ba ako at pwde na siya pumunta sa flat ko.

Alam namin pareho kung bakit kami magkikita. Sex. Yung dapat na one night stand ay masusundan ng pangalawang beses ngayon. Two night stand na ba tawag dito? LOL

Pero this time, tamang tama lang ang oras. Hapon na siya dumating. Hindi kagaya nun last week na may ginawa kaming kababalaghan, tanghaling tapat! Kaloka.

Nun oras na maisara at mai-lock ko ang pintuan ng kwarto ko agad ko na naramdaman ang pagyakap nya mula sa likuran ko...na miss daw niya ko. Tinapik ko lang ang braso nya at sinabing: libog lang yan. Tawanan kami.

Napansin ko ang bitbit nyang plastic bags. May kalahating pakwan, isang litro ng coke, at snacku. Para daw sa akin.

Agad siyang naupo sa gilid ng kama ko at nagpalit ng pang bahay na damit. Dito siya mag stay hanggang kinabukasan. Pareho kaming walang pasok. At home na siya sa kwarto ko, kaya natatawa ako.

Habang nasa harap ako ng computer at nagbabasa ng kung ano, muli kong naramdaman ang mga yakap niya mula sa likod ko. Hinalikan nya pisngi ko.

"Ano yang binabasa mo?" tanong nya. Sinagot ko lang ng wala to. In fairness naman sa knya. Pansin ko na sweet siyang tao. Thoughtful din siya sa BBM tuwing mag memessage siya sa kin, may na-miss daw nya ko, see you soon daw, at kung kumain na ba daw ako minsan.

Gusto ko yung pagiging HUGGER nya...parang gusto nya lagi lumingkis sa akin haha. Ahas ka ba? charot!

Masasabi kong masuwerte magiging kasintahan ni Gian. Pero hindi ako yun. Ewan ko ba, ala kasi ako napi feel na excitement, or kilig kapag kasama ko siya. Wala yung hinahanap ko na sparks. Tagal ko nag antay na may dumating na guy, pero ngayon na heto sa tabi ko at nagpapakita ng interes sa akin ay bakit wala akong maisukli sa knya?

Dahil ba sa nag umpisa kami sa one night stand?

Pero binibigyan ko ng chance ang sarili ko na magustuhan siya. Heto nga at nasa bahay ko siyang muli ngayon.

Nag order kami ng bulalo at fried chicken at masaya namin itong pinagsaluhan. Madami kaming napag usapan habang kumakain. Madami siyang na i-share sa akin tungkol sa personal niyang buhay. Nag work pala siya sa isang local airline sa pinas noon bilang cabin crew at madami pang iba. Pang maalaala mo kaya nga daw ang buhay niya sa dami ng drama.

"Napapasarap ang kain ko Mac, pag kasalo kita..." sabi niya

"bolero!" sabay bato ko ng tissue sa mukha nya haha

Para na rin kami nag dinner date, nag enjoy ako. Sabay namin nilinis ang table na pinagkainan namin. Mabuti nalang lahat ng gamit ko puro disposable! mula sa plato, kutsara at baso! OO hindi ako environment-friendly! Tamad kasi ako maghugas! kundi, siya maghuhugas! chos!

Binuksan ko ang aking red lamp sa side table at pumuwesto kami sa kama habang nanonood ng ASAP sa computer ko...malamig sa loob ng room ko. Namaluktot kami sa kumot. Naramdaman ko na naman ang muling pagkayap ni Gian sa akin. Hinalikan nya ang leeg ko. Idinantay niya ang hita nya sa akin, saktong tumama sa pagkalalaki ko. Sinadya niyang dun mismo idantay. Sakto.

Agad kong naramdaman ang pagtigas nito. Inilayo ko ang hita niya. Sabi ko maganda ang palabas maya maya na yan. LOL!

Pero inaakit niya ko. Tag libog na naman si gago. Kamay na niya nakapatong sa pagkalalaki ko sa ilalim ng kumot. He's licking my neck...di na ko nakatiis nagtama ang labi namin at sinibasib ko na siya ng halik. Mas matagal this time. May pagmamadali pero andun yun sarap ng halik.

Mas gusto ko makipag halikan ng matagal. Labi sa labi. Feeling ko andun ang true essence ng dalawang soul na nagkakasundo...andun ang passion.

Hanggang sa bumaba ang halik niya sa didbdib ko...halinhinan niya itong sinamba...pababa sa puson ko at hanggang sa tuluyan na niyang ilantad ang aking pagkalalaki...agad niya itong isinubo at nilaro...napapaigtad ako tuwing isasagad niya ito sa knyang bibig...hindi ko mapigilan ang mapadaing sa sarap...

Napapasabunot nalang ako sa mga buhok niya sa paghanap ng suporta. Magaling si Gian sa larangan na ito ng pakikipagtalik. Wala akong binatbat sa knya. At hindi ko kaya yun baka magkanda suka suka ako! LOL

This time masasabi kong na enjoy ko ang pakikipag niig sa knya. Mas naramdaman ko ang sarap. Mas andun ang satisfaction kumpara nun unang gabi namin. Kaya naman bago matapos ang gabi ay masaya kami nahiga at natulog.

Kulet nya, pichur-pichur naman daw kami, so yun pinagbigyan ko naman

Kinuha ko ang wax earplugs ko at isinaksak sa tenga ko! Kelangan ko makatulog ngayong gabi sabi ko sa knya! haha. Last time kasi super sabog ako sa puyat dahil sa pag hihilik niya.

Mahilig pa naman si Gian matulog ng nakadantay ang mga hita sa akin, naka akap mula sa likuran ko. Mahilig makipag-spooning. At kapag nakaganun siya sa akin, nakatapat lagi ang mukha niya sa batok ko or sa may tenga ko, pano naman ako makakatulog nun di ba? LOL

Infairness naman epektib ang dinugas ko pamasak sa tenga sa MRI room ng ospital at nakatulog aketch. Ginising ko Gian nung alas siyete na ng umaga. Pero umisa pa muna kami bago siya umiwi! Alam nyo na, with the morning erection and all. Ayun, nag amoy clorox na naman sa buong kwarto.

Afternoon Delight

The kiss escalated to something else and we were both on fire that afternoon...i was catching on my breath...it was a great kiss or I just missed it?! He started to go down on my chest...sucked them...before I knew it...he's pulling my pants down. And he's on junior! LOL

I was so shy of my body that I started to hid them with my fingers and tried to put on my pants again.

"Wait Gian, I need to close the curtains..."

I'm not really fit and it sucks that we're doing this on broad day light! LOL

"No, I don't mind. Just stay here and let me kiss you again."

I didn't listen and stood up. I am not a fan of morning or afternoon sex. I find it unromantic. I like my sex to be dark and romantic...with red lights or candles... But I have no choice Gian arrived early today and he's hot as hell!

So I picked up my darkest curtain that's available on my cabinet and pulled a chair and stood on it to reach the curtain rod on my window. As I stood there, I felt him on my back and stroking my legs and my half erected penis...it was so good that I moaned with pleasure...I cannot concentrate on what I am doing on the rod! He pulled down my pants again while I am still standing on the chair and started touching my penis.

He positioned himself in front of me and started sucking me...I was lost right that moment...I grabbed the curtain rod so tight for support...Oh Lord...I have never been sucked while standing on a chair and in front of my window before...it was hot!

Good thing I did not fall! LOL

Gian was a great lover, he never missed a spot! he even licked my armpitt! Napagod ata ako kaka-ungol shet!

I'm ashamed to admit that I'm not as good as him. But damn he's a performer! LOL

"Do you have a condom?"

"Yes I have..."

"How come you have a condom?"

"Boy scout ako. Laging handa! I bought them before you arrived. I run to the supermarket like a mad man!"

We both laughed!



and the rest was history...

Bleh!



After the hot sex we we're hugging each other and kissing once again. This time its slower...we're taking our time...

We slept on a spooning position. He held my hand as if he don't wanna missed them.

Three hours have passed and the alarm clock rang and I watched him get dressed. I have work later and he needs to go. "do you really have to go to work Mac?" he asked.

Yes I need to.

I walked him to the door and said good bye.

The next day, he's still keeping in touch with me. BBM-ing me like how am I doing and if I had my dinner already, and I miss you, hope to see you soon kind of stuffs... I am not expecting those. I thought its just a one night stand errr one afternoon stand! LOL

I don't mind actually. I'm single. He's single. I might as well give this a shot. Who knows, he might be a great guy to be with, but its still too early. Let's say I'm just enjoying what's on my plate right now. No expectations or whatsoever.

A Date With R.A

It was 3 in the afternoon and I checked my phone for the 3rd time if R.A left any messages, but none, I'm afraid he might cancel our date later today. Last night I've told him thru text that we're gonna see each other at 5 in the afternoon, but no reply, all night I've waited...I tried to go back to sleep but could not.

Eventually, di ako nakatiis...I sent an sms message:

"Why are you not replying my messages?"

I told my self, if he still not gonna reply, I'll consider it cancelled. Fortunately after a few minutes my phone vibrates:

"Sorry, I just woke up..."

I made a deep sigh of relief. I typed in and sent him a reply:

"I'll meet you at 5pm at the lobby and we'll go to the Villagio (a special mall here in Doha where the ceilings take your breath away, with its majestic representation of the blue sky outside. an a fake river at the heart of the mall.)".

"OK" his final text.

I ate my late lunch and think of something not too casual to wear for our first date, I don't wanna look overdressed or too casual, if he ever considers this a date after all! We'll, I do! LOL

I changed clothes 3 times and decided to go with my v-shaped Armani black shirt and topman faded gray skinny jean. I matched it with a black dog tag necklace from river island. I checked my self once again on the mirror and... danced with excitement!LOL

I waited for him at the lobby of our building, I was 10 minutes earlier. Atat lang? then I heard someone approaching, making annoying sound as he walk...and when I finally saw who it was...its Egay! my colleague!

"oh Mac! you're going somewhere??" he said

"yeah. at the villagio"

"with whom?" he noticed that I'm waiting for someone.

"secret..."

"you slut! who is it this time ha?" he insisted on knowing who it is.

"just go and do your own thing OK!"

"No. I'll stay and wait who you're going out with!"

Then R.A appeared and I saw Egay's wide smile as he tried to leave us. For sure he would broadcast it to our department tomorrow! grrrrr!

R.A was wearing almost identical clothes with mine! both black and faded jeans and we're both wearing the same dog tag hahaha! good thing I didn't wear my nerdy eyeglasses!

Inside the cab, I wanna hold his hand and give him light kisses on his lips..but I didn't. Or else he would jump out of the car or the driver might hit the break instantly!

I content my self with playing innocently and accidentally touching his arms and hands...at pasimple simpleng pag akbay...masaya na ko dun...hehehe.

I also found out he likes Kenny Rogers and Dolly Parton! Yuckyyyy! asar talo siya sakin!

He did much of the talking, I just listen and laugh most of the time. He loves to share his stories. I think he's an old fashioned guy. We ate at T.G.I Friday's and had back ribs and steaks and chicken wings and shrimps and salmon. It was a nice dinner though. I love talking to him. He looks too childish with his eyeglasses and braces whenever he remembered something funny and laughed.

Then the pinoy waitress approached me and said:

"sir, please don't get mad if I ask you something..."

For a brief moment, I was speechless and nervous for what she might ask! Could it be she noticed that we're extra sweet to each other and wanna know if we are actually a couple????

"what is it?" I then asked.

"Can I see your wristwatch? Can I ask where you got it?"

Oh. That's my first reaction haha. I thought it was something else. I told her its from Toywatch and left us.

R.A don't wanna see a movie at the Imax, he said he don't like the films being shown. I was disappointed of course. I wanna spend more time with him, and my evil plan involved touching his hands on the dark corners of the cinema! LOL

We've just entered the amusement park and checked out their amazing rides. We've sat at the bench where we could talk a little. I sat so close to him and put my arms at the back of the bench almost on top of his broad shoulders...from time to time I was touching his shoulders sending him intimate carnal signals hahaha!

On our way out of the mall I saw my friend's Ric and his wife Reen and their closeted gay friend Al whom they are talking about! Oh Lord, he's cute!LOL

Ric was teasing me that me and Al look great together without knowing that R.A is my date! and placed us beside each other as they took us home. I was in the middle of Al and R.A! hahaha. Al was so nice and actually "gay".

When we got to our building towards the lift, I asked R.A if he wants to come up at my unit and spend some more time. He said "I think, I'll pass". I just smiled and said goodnight...

Now I was left confused and disappointed, I thought I'd get laid tonight!LOL. Maybe he found my invitation too fast? Kidding aside, I really like R.A, if I wanna be with someone, I want it to be him... insert bruno mars' song GRENADE:

I'll catch a grenade for yah...throw my hand on a blade for yah...I'd jump in front of a train for yah...you know I'd do anything for yah...I would go thru all this pain...take a bullet straight thru my brain...yes, I would die for yah baby...But you won't do the same...

Yeah, thanks Bruno...I don't know if he would do the same.

I still don't know whether he's just looking for a friend or what. I never ask him directly what his feelings about me, so I don't want to conclude yet. nakikiramdam palang ako kumbaga. Let's just wait and see...It's just our first date anyway.

I called up Ric after a few minutes and asked about Al!!! LOL

And Then He Said Yes!!!

For a few days I kept on flirting with R.A, I've been extra sweet, spending extra time talking at him even though I have nothing else to do at the ICU, been throwing jokes about going out and etc, I'm sure he gets it, unless MANHID siya noh!

Then I went to London for 4 days without telling him, and then when I came back Gil told me that when he asked R.A about me this question: "so how are you and mac?" and he told me, R.A replied with this: "he's always missing", that's the time Gil told him "tange, he's in London, you didn't know?"

It made me smile, so, he misses me after all!

And as I soon as I went online on Face book, he started chatting with me:

"Hello, bigla nalang nawala... Yun pala natuloy sa lugar na sinasabi niyang pupuntahan niya"
(hello, you've been gone, and found out you went to that place you're talkin about)

"hahaha, hey! I'm back!"

"walang pasalubong?" he teased
(no souvenir for me?)

"of course, I have! I'll give it to you later"

When we got to see each other, i handed him this big chain made of silver with a print on its heart: I love London. I bought it specially for him. Without him knowing that it has another partner on my keeping...hehehe! hindi niya alam mag jowang bear yun!

"aw shit! May puso pa talaga ha..." Gil teased me and pointed the red heart on the bear I gave to R.A. I knew R.A noticed it too, but I just played innocent. Deadma

I've been trying to hide my feelings towards him, as my friend advised me, that i shall not reveal my true feelings so easily to a guy I like, no matter how much I like him, that I should play hard to get too LOL! So days have passed that our scheds didn't match and we're not able to see each other but I sent an sms message on him once...

When he saw me online at FB he said:

"hello, anong duty? Di ata kita nakikita sa hospital a..."
(hello, what's your duty? How come I havent seen you at the hospital lately?)

"Sungit mo kaya sa text kahapon.." I said
(you we're snobbish yesterday when I text you)

"ah, yeah, I was not in the mood. Work problem. I wanna transfer to another hospital"

"what! you're planning to leave me without going out on a date with me first?LOL!" I can't believe that I really typed the word DATE! waaaaah!

"LOL ka rin"

That's it! that's his fuckin reply to what I just said! Grrrrr!

He's been chatting with me every now and then when ever he sees me online, which I must admit gave a wide smile on my lips...giving me hope, that maybe, maybe...arghhhh! I don't wanna expect anything! F*ck!

But his message yesterday almost made me fell on my chair:

"hello, kelan ka manlilibre?"
(hello, when are you gonna treat me for dinner?)

Pakshet! I used to say those words at him! And this time, he's throwing that line back at me!!! taena! I wanna scream and shout to the world that R.A is finally asking me out!!!

Shit! Shit! Shit!

"Ikaw lang naman ayaw e...kelan ka off?"
(I'm just waiting for you to say yes.When is your day off?)

"Saturday..."

"Ok, saturday then..."

"Ok..."

Let's See It Together!

I was on the hallway about to enter the ICU where I am assigned and the voice of Mel kept on playing over and over again to my ears when we had a conversation at his car earlier:

"ask him out already...ang bagal mo!"

He was referring to R.A his new colleague and my new crush-crushie hehe. I kinda like his nerdy-virginal-soft spoken-character and dark skinned too! Damn! I have so many adjective for him!hehehe.

I like him. As in so much that I'm almost thinking of him every day. I'm just not sure if he likes me too or if he likes straight guys or gay guys too! Its hard to read him!

Its been a few days since I showed interest in him. But I still haven't gone far at all! All I did was to make smile and make-pacute at him and invited him at my face book and had a few chat!

I took a deep breath and spotted him immediately at patient number 3...its his patient I assumed. I didn't go at him yet, instead I went to check on patient number 1...took my time till patient number 2 and when I'm about to see his patient number 3, he's already facing me and was giving me something on his hand....

"hey, here's the pen that I promised to give you..." he said smiling. Oh my gosh, I was about to melt. I mean, I almost forgot that i asked for that same pen like 4 days ago, but here he is still honoring that promise...*kilig*

"thank you! you remembered!" I said and kept the pen to my pocket. and thought: I won't use this pen ever and will kiss it goodnight everytime! Chos!

"of course". he said and went back to his paper works.

I continued on my rounds and Mel whispered "did you invited him out already?"

"not yet! atat ka?sasama ka sa lakad?!" and we laughed together.

When I finally got the chance to approach him alone, I took a deep breath and started a conversation:

"you know what, I hated my friends..."

"huh? why is that?"

"I was asking them since last week to see a movie on I-max, but they didn't say yes, but I found out they saw it yesterday when I was at duty! Imagine!" this is actually a true story haha I didnt make it up, but decided to use the situation on my favor.

"wow I-max. What movie you wanted to see?" he asked.

"The Green Hornet."

"hey that's still new! I've heard some good reviews about it."

I saw the excitement from his eyes. Hmmm, I think he likes the idea of going to see a movie. This is good. I took a deep breath once again and said the magic words:

"Come with me, lets see it together..." I nervously laughed and tap his shoulders for some reason that I don't know! LOL and I just walked away from him and see other patient's chart without knowing his answer!

Grrrrrrr! Stupid! Stupid!

When I calmed down and back to my relaxed self again. I approached him once again and sat in front of his table. Tutukan ko na toh! LOL

I saw Gil, his preceptor (his teacher since R.A is only new to the job) which is my friend by the way. I secretly sent him away from us so that I could have R.A for myself alone!

"so R.A, what now? come lets watch The Green Hornet this weekend"

"where do they have the Imax here?"

"At the villagio".

"How much is the entrance?"

"not that much... I think around 55 riyals"

"expensive..."

"kuripot mo!"

"hahaha I haven't have my paycheck yet Mac. So technically I'm still poor!" and we both laugh at his remarks. When I looked around I saw Mel, Gil and Ate Luz watching us with a giant silent teasing smile on their face! natawa ako sa itsura nila!

I was about to say that the date is on me, that's when his monitors started alarming. He got so busy that I was left hanging again!

Pakshet!

When I approached ate Luz she said: "o ano, napasagot mo na ba?" (did he say yes?) with a voice so loud that R.A might hear at the other side!!!

shhhhhhhh!!! wag ka maingay!!!

Weird E.B

As I'm having my pizza and beef lasagna that I ordered at Pizza hut at the mall, I cant help but have a shallow laugh! I just tried to shook it off and forget about it.

Director, please rewind!

6 hours earlier:

I was chatting online and this Filipino guy sent me a message, had a couple of good conversation, till the routine exchanges of pictures and links. With some casual flirting on the side too. I gotta say, he's a cutie. I invited him to go out. Been wanting to go to the mall because I have to send money to my mom and to buy some personal stuffs. This is hitting two birds with one stone, so why not.

He's jobless and living with his sister's family here in Doha while he seeks job as a nurse. He said he don't have the budget, but I said, its not a problem, I could treat you to a fancy dinner and a movie. Lets call him Kirk

In simple words, I found a friendly date tonight. So after I prepared myself I took a cab and told him I'm on my way. He said, he's also waiting for the bus. As I passed by the lovely scenery of Doha, I've been thinking of where are we gonna eat and what movie to watch. I kinda get excited, and told my friend Cher I'm going out with this guy. Its a routine for me to inform someone close to me that I'll be meeting a new guy, in case something happens, the police might get a lead, right???

So much for paranoia?!LOL

When I finally met him, I noticed another guy with him. He introduced him to me as his friend!

WTF? He brought a friend???!

A chaperone?nyak!

I wanna slap my self and think that this was just a dream! Who else on earth would bring a chaperone on a date at this modern age of gay dating!

What was he, his personal security guard????!

My excitement was gone with the wind, I'm no longer interested. I just wanna go and do what I originally need to do. Both of them are nice, that's a fact, but I'm not ready for this, I'm not good at surprises.

A normal responsible guy would say: Mac, I'll be bringing my friend with me, is that alright with you?

To think that I'll be the one paying for our dinner and movie, didn't he think that it will look so embarrassing on his part bringing his friend?Duh! Its so funny and annoying. I came there to meet him, to get to know him, to have a new friend. But two is way too much for me at that moment. That's why I have to remind my self not to date guys under 25 years old! LOL They're so immature! grrrrrrrrr!

When I was falling in line for the remittance center and they're watching something a few meters I texted kirk: Hey why you didn't tell me you're bringing a friend?I thought its just the two of us.

I saw him picked his cellphone and read it,and take note, together with his friend! They read it together, awww how sweet!LOL!

He replied: Sorry, we saw each other here, and its a shame if I'll snob him, right?

Well, a normal guy would do is this: he would say hi to his friend and if that friend will ask, tell him you'll be meeting someone. Or if your closeted (which is not the case for him) you'll just make an alibi and say goodbye to that friend. And you don't need invite him to your date to think that you're not the one paying! haller!

And a normal friend would also do if your friend told you that he's meeting someone or having a date is to just say good luck and have fun. or if he invites you out of courtesy, you'll just say, no thanks, you go ahead.

I called my friend Cher about my awkward situation. She just laughed at me and said what kind of guy was that! Leave them right away! I texted Kirk again: Hey I think I'm better off alone, I need to buy some things and you surprised me... I'm sorry.

Once again i saw him read my message together with his friend!hahaha what's with this guy?gosh! I never met someone like him. He's weird!

He faced me and waved his goodbye. I sighed for relief! Its such a shame that I planned a good night for us, even thinking of inviting him to go clubbing with me if our plans push through this weekend.

Funny, that I don't have anything interesting to write on my blog recently and good thing he came. LOL!

I just did what i needed to do after they'd go, and I bought a new shirt for our future clubbing and a new perfume, 1 million by Paco Robanne. I bought Issey Miyake's scent 2 weeks ago but my friends didn't like the smell. Too strong I guess. Hope this one is much better.

Issey Miyake

Paco Robanne

Just Friends

"Would you like to have dinner with me sometime? maybe on the 26th, is that OK with you?"

That's what he asked after some time of chatting through messenger, honestly, I like talking to him even though I haven't met him yet, well, I saw his picture already. I was able to know him when he sent me a message telling me how he likes my blog that he almost finished it from the beginning. I was flattered of course. We chat whenever we have a chance.

His name: Aldwin

I agreed on that date, since its my day off and its not bad meeting new friends. I was very vocal about having a new friend. I told him I don't have a bi or gay friend in my life, my friends are straight, male and female. It would make a big difference having someone like me. He agreed since he is new here in Doha, barely a month with no new friends yet, he told me later that he's the only Filipino on their company. Technically he is alone.

I was excited. Even if its 2 weeks to go. I was at work one morning when I decided to text him, we exchanged many messages, when later I told him me and other two friends will dine in at a resto and go to the mall after. Which he will go for late lunch too. He asked if we could meet there, I was hesitant. Its too soon, I thought I still have 2 weeks to meet him!

I'm having butterflies on my stomach! I don't know what to type in on my cellphone keypads. Yes or no? Finally I said: OK, I'll find a way when we're at the mall. My friends are already annoyed at me since I was on my phone almost the whole time while we're eating texting him. But my friends enjoyed the foods and the chats and it took them a long time before deciding to go malling!

Aldwin had to go back at their office! So there, meeting:cancelled! I was sad.

I told him we could catch up later or grab a coffee somewhere since he lives a few blocks from my building. When I came home around 8 in the evening, he invited me to have a dinner instead at a nearby fast food. I changed to casual clothes and hit the street, its a walking distance from my flat.

He came in earlier than me. Then I saw him, wearing his jeans and eyeglasses. Hmmm, pwede!!! He's a jolly person I could tell, and no pretensions, no "arte" whatsoever. I like him...as a friend, LOL! Its too early to think about anything romantic and besides I don't know what's in his mind yet. Our meeting was very nice, I enjoyed it. We're talking about anything for more than an hour.

I thought: I like this guy, he could be a very good boyfriend...

But I immediately erased that thought. I don't want to rush in and hurt in the process. Its better to be friends for the meantime, and if its meant to be, and escalated to something deeper, why not. But now, I got to hold my emotions and enjoy the new friendship with him.

"its still early, can we go to your flat and continue our conversation?" he asked.

Next thing I knew we were walking on the familiar street towards my flat. I was embarrassed because I'm not a neat person when it comes to my house!ahaha. I'm messy and lazy cleaning up! We watched TV and laughing and having a great time. We didn"t notice that its getting very late. Its 12am. He have work at 8am, I asked him: What time you'll go home?

No response. I knew he don't want to end the night so soon. I could sense it. Me too. I don't want him to leave yet. Sexual tensions are building up. I'm fighting it. I made a promise to myself that sex will be the last thing on my mind. I'm sick and tired of having sex first before knowing a guy or him knowing me first.

Hindi ako pakipot ha! LOL

He was sitting on my couch and I decided to sit on its armchair, it surprised me when he lay his arms on my legs for comfort while watching TV, I allowed him, until he put my arms around his shoulders. I kissed his hair. I hugged him tighter this time. I don't want that moment to end. Its magical.

I whispered to his ear, I don't want you to go...

Ok, I'll stay...

But you have work in the morning?

I'll go at 6.

Ok.

Next thing I knew, I was changing the pillow cases on my bed! waaaaa!!! Am I doing the right thing here???? For sure something will happen!

I told him : no sex OK? we'll just sleep together.

"of course" he said. Then he took off his shirt and left his boxer shorts.

I panicked deep inside, if he will sleep shirtless that would be dangerous for me, I will feel his skin next to mine and I will explode with hornyness!LOL. I offered him a shirt, he refused, said he cannot sleep with it. I sighed.

When I came back from the bathroom he's already sleeping. I went to my side of the bed. I don't know what possessed me but I hugged him from his back. He acknowledge it, he came closer.I tried to sleep and keep my hard dick away from his back and butt!LOL prayed that it would stop pulsating!haha

I heard him snoring a little. I felt his bare skin on my arms. It felt good. I stopped myself from biting his earlobes. I slept after a while. I took my arms from him and decided to shift on my side, he followed and this time he was the one hugging me from my back. I missed this. Someone hugging me. Cuddling me...when was the last time someone hugged me this close while sleeping? a year ago? with Brian...

But I was surprised when he started giving me light touches on my shoulders, seducing me...he started moving his hips against mine. My eyes wide open! Oh no...this is it! Will I do it with him...but he promised no sex...

He took my hand and put inside his boxers, I felt his manhood...

"please s@ck it..." he whispered. I said no....he begged "please..."

I faced him and his lips gently moved closer to mine, I kissed him, slowly he kissed me back, then hungrily...I moaned with pleasure...

I like kissing, maybe liked it more than the actual sex itself...

We are both on fire, but I'm still undecided if I want to continue this... I promised myself not to be this easy on sex...been very casual about sex with darkguy before...

I promised my self that the next time I'll do it, it have to be with someone I love, someone who loves me...

I gathered all my self control and said : we cant do this, we are friends.

And with those words, as if I threw a cold drum of water on him and he stopped.

"yes we are friends" he said

I kissed his lips gently and hugged him until we slept.

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Its 6am he rose from my bed, I didn't move a muscle wait for him to wash up and dressed up. He lay his head on my tummy and wait for me to respond. I hugged him. But didn't kiss him I knew I have a killer breath that time LOL!

I walked him to the door and as I was putting the keys he moved very close from my back and started touching me wildly, I was immediately on fire, I put my hand inside his pants and touched his manhood, he pulled down my shorts from my back and touching me...we almost did it.

He stopped and said: we are friends....
damn! i said im my mind

I'll go, thanks. I'll talk to you later. he said.

I waved goodbye and closed my door.

I went back to my bed and jerked off! LOL

Related posts about Aldwin:
I'll Sleep On Your Bed
I'll Say It Anyway
A Quickie Post
Friends Again